Since the world is ending tomorrow I have a few things I’d
like to say.
Ø
To my family – I LOVE YOU GUYS!!! You are freaking nuts!
o
My parents – so glad neither of you ever really
turned into “grown-ups”! I’ve inherited
that and it has made my life so much more fun than if I was actually a “grown-up”. You have some great genetic material – thank you
for sharing! And for being my playmates
in life as well as my parents. And thanks
for being good looking, smart and talented.
I got some good kids out of that genetic mix! My family looks great in family
pictures! Love you!!!
o
My siblings – I will miss our conversations and
how the volume goes up and up as we all talk over each other since we all have
issues with waiting for someone to take a breath and have large lung
capacities. And we all know everything
and no one can tell us different! If
only the world could sit in on our discussions – all problems would be
solved. Stupid world doesn’t know what
it’s missing out on! Love you!!!
o
My kids – you guys are my built in favorite
people to hang out with! Funny how that
turned out since I was ready to run away from home/praying to be taken to
jail/wishing you’d call child protection on me so they’d take you/me away/dreaming
of being drugged up in a psych ward so nothing would matter so often when I was
raising you. You were too much like me
and my sibs – my Mom got her revenge. I
raised a pack of “I hope you have kids just like you someday”s! Love you!!!
o
Ken – ok – I really needed another serious dose
of my Ken in January. DAMMIT!!! I’m bitter about this one. If the idiots are wrong and the world doesn’t
end tomorrow, it’s on baby!!! Are you
thinking what I’m thinking? Why yes, I
think you are! I’ve had more damned fun
doing everything with you! Love you!!!
Ø
To my classmates – I’m thankful for facebook so
I could learn what a pain in the ass I was as a kid and that you guys aren’t nearly
as bad as I thought you were! In fact,
you’re pretty great! Who’da thunk? I’ve been happily educated! You guys rock! Hopefully we’ll party together in the next
phase of existence!
Ø
To my pals – So glad I met your sarcastic, cranky,
goofball asses! You can’t be a delicate
flower and be a close friend with me. You
gotta be able to tolerate some crude/foul language/discussions because when I’m
with those I know well, I really relax and that can make some run for the
hills! I’m grateful for you guys and
that you can hand it back! I don’t hang
with pussies! So guys, you aren’t pussies
in my book – you rock! And I love
you! And after today you won’t have to listen
to any more of my shit, like when I whine or am mean or unfair or bitchy. I know, you’ll miss it. J
Ø
State of Minnesota – kiss my lily white ass! (aside
- I’ve stopped tanning for the winter so it’s white) You fuckers tax too much of my income and if
the world had lasted long enough I’d have finally gotten my house sold and
moved someplace that isn’t all full of tax and spend fiends! Piss off!
o
On a side note, you have a gorgeous state in the
spring, summer and fall. Winter,
pfft. But you tax too much and live
outside your means. And I’m sick of
being afraid to admit to being a fiscal conservative for fear of getting my car
keyed.
Ø
Governor Dayton – stop looking like a beaten
puppy dog!! I tell you, every time I see
your face I want to run up and shake you and slap you and tell you to knock it
off! Plus, don’t speak. You sound like Elmo with a cold. Not good.
Ø
Going to keep it local because thinking about
the federal level makes me want to end things a bit early. Seriously.
I’ve made a point of avoiding that as much as possible over the years in
an effort to maintain my sanity and not have to start taking
anti-depressants. Avoidance is my
medicine and it has worked. Gotta get
back to it because I’m getting that sick feeling again just from writing this! If the world wasn’t ending tomorrow I’d have
to say I think the US is pretty fucked right now.
Ø
To my boss – I’ve been making an effort. Yesterday was a good day with us! We LOL’d together in emails. Rare but hey, it happened and I’m glad! Sadly it happened because I was an idiot but
that’s beside the point. I still wish I
would have lived long enough to quit working for you. So I could have done a private happy dance on
my last day. Either that or managed to
actually decide to like working for you instead of wanting to storm out of here
at random moments. I think I’m getting
there some days and then it hits again.
But tomorrow it’s all over so no more worries! We’re ending on a good note! Unless we manage to screw it up today. I’m going to avoid contact as much as
possible to be on the safe side.
All I can think of right now. I’m ready.
I think I’ll go home and engage in some of the 7 deadly sins just for
the fun of it tonight! Going out with a
bang! A small bang but a bang nonetheless! ROCK ON!!!
Or not. J
