Migraines

Had another migraine yesterday.  Luckily Excedrin Migraine took away the worst of the pain but still spent most of the day with a solid headache, feeling woozy and slightly nauseated.  Most people would never know I had a migraine unless I told them.  I might look tired when going thru it but I don't think it's obvious.

I remember years ago when a friend of mine told me how she had had such a bad migraine that she screamed thru it.  I remember thinking screaming would make it worse.  I questioned if it actually was a migraine?

When I first started having migraines, I didn't have Excedrin Migraine to fight them off for me.  Here's how it went for me:

1) I start noticing that it's hard to see.  I'm blinking and struggling to make things out.  After a bit I notice an arc of sparkling shards of rainbow lights slowly widening across my field of vision.  I see it when I shut my eyes also.  I now know that it's called an aura.  It's my warning system.  Not everyone is lucky enough to get a warning.  I do.  But the semi-blindness I get isn't fun to deal with.  I was dealing with that yesterday.  I have woken up with a migraine.  That's the worst because you slept thru the warning.  There is no rhyme or reason to them...they just happen.

 Back in the day, when this warning hit, I knew it was time to go home IMMEDIATELY.  I was suddenly in a race against time because when the aura went away, the migraine would begin.  Migraines don't care what you're in the middle of, or who is depending on you.  Back in the day, when they hit, my life had to stop.  Honestly it was pretty awful.  There are few things in life that I don't struggle thru but migraines were one of them.

2) The migraine hits.  I become light sensitive and need to be in the dark.  Light hurts.

I become sound sensitive and need to be in a quiet place.  Noise hurts.

There was often vomiting.  It hurts so bad it makes you vomit, which is the last thing you want to be doing when you're hurting that bad!

And the pain?  It felt like someone was inside my head pounding with a hammer.  There was no relief and no escape unless I was lucky enough to fall asleep.  I used to have Tylenol with codeine in it that I'd take to try to knock myself out during those sessions.  Sometimes it worked.

Oh, and you don't want to move.  Moving hurts.  I really hated when I'd have to vomit.  Felt like my head would explode.  This phase could go on for hours.

3)  The migraine passes.  You feel like you've been sick.  You're woozy and out of it.  There is sometimes a residual headache that can last up to 2 days afterwards.  I tend to feel fuzzy-muddled.  Like I'm muffled and somehow subdued.  I get this reaction despite taking meds.  Today I feel "off" but functional.  Not 100% but good enough.

Sometimes you get another one within a few days.  That used to happen to me a lot.  Now it doesn't.  Maybe it's because of my meds?  No idea but I'm glad I don't get a series of them so much anymore!

I've recently started experiencing aphasia.  When it first happened I was joking that I must have had a stroke because I couldn't find the words.  Honestly I was a little worried until I investigated further and found out it can happen after a migraine.  That made sense based on the timing.  I'd seen my Dad experience aphasia after his strokes.  You know what you want to say but you can't find the words in your brain.  You can suggest other things sort of like it to try to describe what you want to say.  My Dad would call a winter coat a warm.  He had the problem much worse that I ever did but his experience helped me recognize what was happening to me enough to be concerned.  Despite having headed off the worst of it with Excedrin I still suffered the aphasia.  Luckily it's temporary after migraines.  I just have to be patient.

I'm lucky and have found a medicine that helps!  When the aura hits, I take Excedrin Migraine and wait.  Yesterday the headache was pretty bad but I was still functional.  I no longer have to race home for a dark, silent room to suffer it out.  Now my life can continue.

Sadly I know my medicine does not always work for others.  Some folks really struggle to find any relief.

I wanted to write this to maybe help people understand that a migraine is not just a really bad headache.  It can be debilitating and actually force someone to stop in their tracks and just ride it out. It can literally pull them away from their life and they have no say in it.  They aren't being babies.  It's BAD.

I'm one of the lucky ones who has found treatment.  Others have not and need support and understanding.  I'm hoping this might help with some understanding of the experience if you aren't one who's ever had a migraine.

my friday morning political rant

I think the U.S. is going to get the president it deserves. If people want to keep deluding themselves about these people the parties are pushing at us as the only presidential options. They are pitiful...we can't find anyone better in this entire country than these people??? I mean our main GOP contender is a bigoted, egomaniac with the self control and tact of a 3 yr old. The other options are not great improvements either in my opinion but at least wouldn't be quite as damaging to the country as the current front runner. I've learned I'm too conservative but not religious enough for the GOP. I don't feel that any of the options truly represent me. Not one of them. I am for equal rights for gays. If the idiots want to get married, let them. If they want their pain in the ass "when are you getting married" pestering card taken away, that's their choice. They get to be pestered like all the rest of us now. Equality. Fun times. I want borders tightened because we should be able to control who comes in (we don't want criminals and drug dealers using our gimpy borders to pursue their bad ends. I also want them tightened because the border states are struggling to keep up with their infrastructures. It's creating a financial hardship for those states that needs to be dealt with. We need to control our borders for many reasons.   At the same time I'm against massive deportations. I think that's a stupid idea. This country was built on immigration. While they may "take jobs" they also create them because there needs to be infrastructure to take care of an increasing population and they cause an increase in demand for housing, clothing, food, etc. That creates opportunities for businesses to grow. In essence, I want borders controlled and legal immigration but there should be a pathway to citizenship for illegals who are already in this country, working hard alongside us. I personally would like it if there was no abortion BUT my skin literally crawls over the idea that the government gets to dictate what a woman does with her body. A woman should not be forced to carry a pregnancy to term. I wish they all would but I don't think they should be forced to. This is a tricky one but I consider myself pro-abortion on principle. I'm not liberal enough for the Dems. I am for equal rights for gays. If the idiots want to get married, let them. If they want their pain in the ass "when are you getting married" pestering card taken away, that's their choice. They get to be pestered like all the rest of us now. Equality. Fun times. As for guns? I don't own one. Never felt the need. At the same time I think it's foolish to think that making gun laws tougher is going to stop these terrible crimes from happening. I think that is equivalent to being an ostrich and sticking your head in the sand. Law abiding citizens are not doing these crimes. I think that taking money from the rich to give to the poor sounds like a good idea but it's misguided. All this rich hating fascinates me since the political leaders who are perpetuating it tend to be wealthy and I don't hear that they are offering their extra cash to the needy. And don't we all wish we were rich? If I was rich I wouldn't think anyone else had a right to my money. They don't. This is a nation of opportunity, not a guarantee of a life of comfort. We do need to care for truly needy...the infirm, the elderly, special needs, etc but not able bodied, minded folks. Not people who are sitting around with their hands out saying "gimme". I did a few years on welfare back in the day. There is a generational thing going on (or there used to be) and I witnessed it. No reason for it but it exists. I'm not getting into welfare any more than this except to say that reform is needed to weed out abusers and to support people when they try to take care of themselves instead of penalizing them, hence keeping them locked in the system. It isn't easy to get off of. I speak from personal experience. Here's my thoughts on the other side... Our main Dem contender should be in jail but is untouchable because she has some very powerful supporters who want her to be president. She has acted like she's above the law for a long time and that's because she really is! Pays to have friends in high places. But it makes on more inclined to do whatever the hell she wants and know she can get away with it. Her smug attitude is valid. She KNOWS she's untouchable.  She can blow us all off until the end of time if she wants to. She is above the law. If anyone else in her position had done what she's done, they'd be in prison right now. The one who is giving her sweats is a well intentioned but mislead communist. Communism doesn't work. It's proven. That's my opinion for those of you who want to pipe up and say "I like so & so". It's a thing. If we keep voting like our government is a reality show being put on for our entertainment, then we get what we deserve. I also think that at this point in time, our politicians are a bigger threat to the well being of this country than ISIS or the Taliban. ISIS and the Taliban may kill people but our politicians are dividing this country and destroying our economy with their bad decisions, posturing, their lip service to achieve their own selfish ends, no matter the cost to this nation and with the constant partisan in-fighting.